Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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