what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
