Define "chronic" masturbator.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize
