just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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