she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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