Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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