I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.