drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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