watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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