woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Randomize
