went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So much rum. So many feels.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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