I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
