Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Its not alright that i make out with a manican.

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  (404): Its not alright that i make out with a manican. http://tfl.nu/ol2k
  Replies (4) Good night (706) Bad night (959)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Are you okay?

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.

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  (908): Are you okay? (508): Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry. http://tfl.nu/ztu1
  Replies (19) Good night (3319) Bad night (688)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair

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  (409): nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair http://tfl.nu/hpi9
  Replies (26) Good night (596) Bad night (4436)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.

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  (918): the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing. http://tfl.nu/e8cz
  Replies (61) Good night (5836) Bad night (1198)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night

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  (917): you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night http://tfl.nu/accx
  Replies (8) Good night (1244) Bad night (6697)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.

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  (262): Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile. http://tfl.nu/y44t
  Replies (27) Good night (806) Bad night (7117)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had

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  (717): They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had http://tfl.nu/qmkc
  Replies (46) Good night (4911) Bad night (1777)
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  (883): View more from

  I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet

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  (883): I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet http://tfl.nu/tmsx
  Replies (7) Good night (3084) Bad night (1264)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?

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  (708): Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason? http://tfl.nu/eo4z
  Replies (3) Good night (2760) Bad night (821)
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  (925): View more from California

  First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.

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  (925): First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me. http://tfl.nu/pldx
  Replies (14) Good night (2672) Bad night (891)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.

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  (651): She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations. http://tfl.nu/80vt
  Replies (8) Good night (3384) Bad night (794)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?

  (408): View more from California

  JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.

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  (902): Is this a genuine concern or are you just high? (408): JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN. http://tfl.nu/lbkb
  Replies (5) Good night (3894) Bad night (824)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee

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  (904): I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee http://tfl.nu/enfq
  Replies (18) Good night (753) Bad night (1623)
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  (714): View more from California

  I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.

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  (714): I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner. http://tfl.nu/e65g
  Replies (3) Good night (532) Bad night (288)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?

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  (601): When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema? http://tfl.nu/3tz6
  Replies (1) Good night (548) Bad night (222)

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