you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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