i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
