I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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