Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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