At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize