there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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