so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize