Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize