we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
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