i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
