dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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