Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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