she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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