I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
