Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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