I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize