OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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