the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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