I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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