I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
you never un-have a 4some
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
false alarm, still single
Randomize