This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
