Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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