I puked a lego.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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