after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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