Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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