apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
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We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
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You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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