it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize
