We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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