My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
