you're like a bully in the Christmas story
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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