She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
