Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
