So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
You have to summon your inner elephant
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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