problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
You made out with two different species that night
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
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