I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
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He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
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So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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