Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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