During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
